The Law of Attraction is usually described as a “universal law” (like gravity is also a universal law) that delivers into your life whatever you focus on the most.
A negative focus will attract mostly negative experiences, while a positive focus will attract mostly positive experiences.
Sounds simple enough, right? Think positive, get positive. Think negative, get negative.
But there’s a little more to it than that.
Current knowledge about the Law of Attraction reveals a clear connection between our thoughts, emotions, beliefs, expectations, and the world around us.
Basically, here’s how it works:
Thoughts + Emotions + Beliefs + Expectations = Reality
Let’s break down each of these components to better understand how they work together.
Your thoughts provide the general structure for your reality. You perceive your surroundings and gear your emotions according to your thoughts. When you think positively, you usually “feel” positively.
In other words, positive thoughts make you feel good, and negative thoughts make you feel bad.
One common misconception is that your thoughts create your reality. Your thoughts actually don’t create anything by themselves.
Can you imagine if you “created” everything you thought about? Your nightmares would all come true, as well as every fear and worry you’ve ever had! No thank you!
In actuality, your thoughts need to be infused with emotion in order to be formed in physical reality.
Your emotions could accurately be described as the “fuel” that gives life to your thoughts. When you hold a specific thought or idea in your mind and generate strong emotions for or about it – you bring it into your life!
Emotions are the driving force behind your ability to create your reality.
If you take nothing else away from reading this page, the MOST important thing I want you to understand is the absolute raw power that your emotions hold!
This is why negative thoughts can be so destructive. When you focus on negative things and emit negative emotions about them – you attract them!
Likewise, when you think positive thoughts and emit positive emotions about them – you attract them!
Beliefs and Expectations
Your beliefs and expectations act as gatekeepers for your reality. No matter how hard you try to think and feel positively, a limiting belief or negative expectation has the power to BLOCK what you’re trying to attract.
It doesn’t matter how many affirmations you recite, or how strongly you visualize yourself having something you want – if you hold limiting beliefs about it, your subconscious mind will NOT allow you to have it!
You either don’t believe it’s possible or don’t believe you deserve it, so it will not be possible for you.
If you think you may have limiting beliefs that are blocking the things you’re trying to attract, fear not!
We’re going to go through a very simple, step-by-step process for not only attracting what you want, but also transforming any limiting beliefs that may be blocking it.
Before we do, however, it’s important to understand that the Law of Attraction actually has a scientific basis. Knowing this should help you to believe more strongly that it really IS real – it’s not “all in your head”!
Step One: Asking for What You Want
You may have heard that “ASKING” the universe for what you want is the first step in attracting it.
True enough, but what does it mean to “ask”? Is it as simple as speaking your desire aloud?
Traditionally when we ask for something, we say, “Please may I have . . . ?”
But the universe works slightly differently than that.
Believe it or not, “asking” the universe for something is as simple as getting very clear about what you want.
Once you conceive a clear desire, you have already asked for it. Remember, you are interconnected with the universe through a field of energy – that “stuff” that composes everything and everyone.
In the very moment you conceive a desire, the universe receives your request.
The tricky part is getting clear about exactly what your desires are. What DO you want? Do you already have a clear desire?
Before you answer, understand that I’m not asking what you don’t want.
Were you going to say something like, “I don’t want to struggle anymore. I don’t want to be broke anymore. I don’t want to be sick anymore.”?
Those are things you DON’T want. What DO you want?
Most often you’ll want the opposite of what you don’t want.
If you don’t want to be sick anymore, that means you WANT to be healthy and strong. If you don’t want to be broke anymore, that means you WANT to have plenty of money. And so on.
That’s easy enough. But also important is to avoid settling for something you think you can have, rather than what you REALLY want.
This can be tricky because your limiting beliefs might make you think you want one thing, when in actuality you want something else.
For example, you might say you want an easy job that pays well, but deep inside you’re yearning for total financial independence.
If you don’t believe that total financial independence is possible for you, you will find yourself settling for the next best thing.
Another example: You might think you want a job teaching music, but deep inside you long to be a famous musician.
In both of these examples, you hold a belief that what you want isn’t possible, so you’re settling for the next best thing.
You don’t have to settle with the Law of Attraction!
In fact, settling will cause big problems because you won’t emit strong enough energy toward what you want (because it’s not really what you want), and you won’t attract it.
Even if you do manage to attract it, you won’t feel satisfied because it’s not what you truly want.
Is there something you’ve been wanting but haven’t been willing to believe you can have it?
Have you been settling for what you think you can get, instead? Let me tell you a little secret:
“You are never given a dream without also being given the power to make it come true!”
I wish I could take credit for that little gem, but it’s actually a quote by Richard Bach – one that holds immense wisdom. Think about that statement for a moment.
Why do you think you have the dreams you do? So you can live out your life feeling unfulfilled and dissatisfied?
No! It’s because you DO have the power to make them come true. But first you have to be willing to believe you can.
Are you feeling a little clearer about what you really want now? If not, take a few minutes right now to jot down some ideas.
Just focus on your initial desires; don’t worry about long-term goals for now. If you could bring ANYTHING into your life right now, what would it be?
Where would you be living? What type of work would you do? What would your relationships look like?
What would your body look like?
Think about what you would create in all areas of your life, from health to money, friendships to career, and everything in between. Write it down in as much detail as you can.
(You don’t have to attract all of this at once, by the way; you’ll start with one thing and then focus on the other stuff later.)
Now, once you have conceived your desire(s), you don’t really have to do anything at all to “ask” for them. Remember, just conceiving the desire IS asking!
However, some people like to make asking more of a tangible process by either verbalizing their desires, creating a video “vision board,” writing intentions, scripting or other techniques.
If you feel inspired to do any of those things, go right ahead!
One of the more popular methods that people have had success with, is in the form of digital vision boards.
These work in the form of moving images that your mind can easily start to adapt and believe; encouraging the engagement of the law of attraction to manifest your dream.
If you’re interested to learn more about this method, have a look at the mind movies review for more information about how this works.
Moving on though, also important is understanding WHY you want something.
What will it do for you to have this thing you want? What qualities or benefits will it bring to you and your life? What ESSENCE of this thing do you want to experience?
Asking these questions is a great way to further clarify your desires and be sure you’re not settling for something that you don’t really want.
Step Two: Believing It’s Already Yours
Once you’ve asked for what you want, it’s time to start examining your beliefs.
How do you know if you have limiting beliefs? For me the easiest way to tell has been to pay close attention to how I FEEL when I think about the things I want.
Limiting beliefs always create sensations of doubt, fear or anxiety.
Bring to mind something you want right now, something that you haven’t been able to attract into your life.
Maybe it’s more money, a better job, the love of your life, better health, or anything else.
Do you really believe it’s possible for you to have it? Do you really believe you deserve it?
Examine your feelings about it, and you’ll likely discover a belief that it can’t (or won’t) happen, or a low level of self-worth that is blocking you from accepting it.
There are other types of limiting beliefs too, like believing that it will be really hard to make something happen, or believing that other things have to take place before your desire can manifest.
Step Three: Letting Go
You now know that the Law of Attraction is activated by your thoughts, feelings, beliefs and expectations.
You know how to get clear about what you want, ask for it, and strengthen your belief that it’s possible and you deserve to have it.
Now comes one of the biggest challenges: LET GO OF IT.
That’s easier said than done, but once you understand the importance of this step you’ll find it within you to do whatever it takes.
By the way, is this the first time you’re hearing about this step? Many texts on the Law of Attraction talk about 3 steps: Ask, Believe, Receive.
Where did this extra step come from?
Letting go has always been part of the process, and it’s mentioned occasionally in other books and audios, but I feel that it’s SO VITALLY IMPORTANT to the process that it should be a step all its own.
I’ll explain exactly why it’s so important, but first let’s go over what it means to let go.
Letting go means detaching from any attempts to control the process or timing of your manifestation.
Here’s what most of us are used to doing: We decide we want something, set a goal to achieve it, rack our brains to figure out a way to get it, and then do everything in our power to make it happen.
Even more importantly, we remain emotionally attached to getting this thing we want, so if it doesn’t show up right away we get more and more impatient and frustrated.
A very big problem occurs when you do this with the Law of Attraction: You interfere with the process and delay the arrival of what you want.
By not letting go, you are in essence trying to force something into being, rather than allowing the universe to work on your behalf.
It’s not that taking action is such a bad thing, but our forced actions send a message of distrust to the universe.
It’s kind of like saying, “I don’t believe that you’ll help me, so I’m going to try and do it all myself.”
So the universe says, “Okay, fine. Let me know how it works out for you.”
By the way, there’s nothing wrong with doing it all yourself, but then that wouldn’t be working with the Law of Attraction, would it? 🙂 It would just be you taking action on your own.
Been there, done that, and bought the T-shirt.
If you want the Law of Attraction to work on your behalf, you MUST LET GO AND STEP OUT OF THE WAY.
That means two things:
1) First, it means not trying to figure out how to get what you want. It means asking for what you want and then letting the universe bring it to you.
Sometimes the universe will nudge you to take a specific action, in which case you should definitely do it.
But if you don’t feel a nudge to take a specific action, you don’t have to force anything by coming up with action steps yourself. Don’t worry about “how” your desire will manifest.
Just know that it will.
2) Second, letting go means detaching emotionally. If you feel any kind of desperate need, fear, anxiety or attachment to this thing you want, you will infuse those emotions into the creation process.
Instead of saying, “I am open to receive this thing,” you’ll be saying, “I don’t have what I need; I need this thing, please hurry!”
As you know, the Law of Attraction responds to your emotional frequency, so it will reflect back whatever emotional quality you put out there. In this case, you’ll simply receive more lack and neediness.
Letting go means knowing that your desires are being formed and delivered, but you’re still okay without them.
There’s a big element of acceptance involved here. Acceptance of the process, the timing, and your circumstances as they are right now.
Simply trust, let go, and let the magic happen!
Step Four: Receiving Your Manifestation
Now that you’ve asked for what you want, you’re working on your beliefs, and you’re letting go – it’s time to receive! Sounds great, right? But hold on a minute.
“Receiving” in relation to the Law of Attraction may not be the same thing you’re thinking about.
You’re probably thinking of receiving as the moment when your desire is delivered into your life in physical form, but that’s the very last piece of the puzzle.
First, you need to put yourself into a state of receptiveness, or ALLOWING.
The word “allowing” brings to mind visions of openness and non-resistance – and it is indeed such a state. But it goes even deeper than that.
Allowing means thinking, feeling and acting as if you already have what you want.
It means undergoing a complete inner shift so that you now live FROM the perspective of a person who has what they want. This is a difficult state to describe, so let’s look at a couple of examples:
Imagine that you’re trying to attract more money into your life. You get a clear idea of exactly how much money you want, you ask for it by creating a vision board or writing out your desire in full detail.
You work on your beliefs, gradually convincing yourself that it’s possible for you to receive it and that you deserve it.
But when you’re not spending your time on these activities, you’re obsessing about lack, worrying about how you’re going to pay the bills and feeling frustrated because more money isn’t showing up in your life yet.
Are you in a state of allowing when you do these things? No!
You decide you are ready for a meaningful relationship and you want to attract your
You go through all of the steps described above, but then spend most of your time complaining to your friends that there are no decent men (or women) out there.
You talk about how lonely you are, how it’s impossible to meet potential partners without going to clubs, and so on. Are you allowing?
The more you focus on what you DON’T WANT, the more of it you’re going to attract!
Every time you complain, get frustrated or invest emotionally into situations you don’t want, you are cementing them more firmly in your reality.
So, are you supposed to just ignore the things in your life that you’re not happy with?
Generally, yes. Or, if you can’t ignore them completely, at least avoid becoming upset and emotionally entangled with them.
Of course, there are certain things you just can’t ignore – nor should you try.
For example, let’s say you receive an unexpected bill in the mail and you don’t have the money to pay it.
Hiding it in a drawer and ignoring it probably isn’t a good idea. In that type of situation, definitely do what you can to come up with the money and handle it the best you can.
However, while you’re handling it you should be sure not to switch into a lack focus by getting upset or angry. Stay calm and do what needs to be done, then place your focus back on allowing more money into your life.
I know you must be thinking that I’m out of my mind for suggesting this! You probably think it’s impossible to control your emotional state like this, but I assure you it’s very possible.
It does take practice however, so don’t be surprised if you sway back and forth at first. Just keep making an effort to invest emotionally ONLY in the things you want to create more of. It gets easier the more you do it.
Progress, Not Perfection
I want to stress one final thing: you do NOT have to be perfect at staying in a state of allowing 100% of the time in order for your desire to manifest.
As I said, it can be difficult to avoid investing emotionally in the things you don’t want, and no one expects you to become an emotionless robot.
Here’s a little secret: as long as you can place yourself into a state of allowing
more often than you are in a state of resistance, you’re ahead of the game!
Let’s face it; we are emotional creatures. It’s perfectly normal for our emotions to be triggered by outside influences.
It’s going to happen occasionally no matter how good you get at controlling your emotional state.
However, as long as you spend as much time as you can focused on what you
want rather than what you don’t want, a few little blips here and there are not going to make a big difference.
The key is to develop a strong self-awareness so that you can quickly bring yourself back into alignment when you realize you’re focusing on the wrong end of the emotional spectrum.
No matter what, keep in mind that it takes a lot of practice and patience to truly master the deliberate use of the Law of Attraction. But the more you work with the principles, the more progress you should see.